Yamcha strikes out
by bvprincess23
Summary: After realizing, finally, that Bulma will never be his, Yamcha decides to go looking around. A park, some unfourtuanate girls and cheap pickup lines? This won't end well, now will it?


_**Disclaimer- **__Do you think I own Dbz? If you say yes, you should see a doctor. I am not a rich Japanese man named Akira. Whaddya think now?_

_**Summary-**After realizing Bulma is no longer his, Yamcha decides to go looking around. A park, some girls and cheap pickup lines... This won't end well, now wil it?_

_**(a/n- **Lookie here, I'm back with another One-shot! Sorry about my other stories, I'll update so don't worry. That Dende oneshot promised will be up soon, sorry. Enjoy this!)_

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><p><strong><span>Yamcha strikes out<span>**

_Money? **Check.**_

_Mouth spray?** Check.**_

_Combed hair? **Check.**_

_Cute face?** Check.**_

_Hunky mucsles?** Check.**_

_'I am totally getting myself a new girlfriend today. Take THAT Vegeta!' _Yamcha thought confidently to himself, walking through the park entrance, having finally finished combing his hair after half an hour.

The first place he stopped was the fountain. Right away he spotted curly blond hair dropping to the waist of, in his opinion, a rather shapely body. He immidiatley walked over and tapped her shoulder, begginning to talk.

"Hey sweet thang! How's about you and me go back to my place and- AHHH!" He suddenly let out a bit of a girlish shreik when he saw the face of the _beautiful blond_. She was... well... Old.

_'Dang! I need some of that shampoo she uses, must be good for her hair to look so lively and-'_

"How sweet!" The woman said grabbing his arm. "I would love to... how do you kids say it- have some fun. But not until I clean my denters. And you can even watch..."

"I... err... I didn't-" Yamcha stuttered, yelping and jumping when she pinched his butt. Without another word, he yelped and ran away as fast as he could without gaining any attention. He finally stopped and took a breath.

"Wow, what a bad start..." he mumbled to himself. He sighed but brightened visibly when he spotted a bench, or rather the brunette on the bench. He grinned and dashed right over. He sat beside her, trying to hide his grin and replace it with a _sexy _smile.

The girl looked up, an annoyed look on her face, but not taking the hint, Yamcha spoke.

"So where ya from cutie? Heaven?" She looked rather annoyed but replied.

"Yeah, that's right. I'm from heaven. I died 20 years ago, **just like that pickup line**!" Then she turned back to the book in her lap, hoping to enjoy the rest of her time at the par-

"So uhhh, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" Yamcha tried again.

"NOt as much as when you hit planet** rejection!"** She basically growled, not even looking up.

Not one to give up on girls (Which is why his ass has been kicked so much by Vegeta), Yamcha went at it again.

"You know, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put _U_ and _I_ together." He swore she growled like an animal.

"Really? Because I would put _**F **_and _**U**_ together! Get a life, jerk!" She shouted, slamming her book closed and stomping away.

Yamcha jumped off the bench and inwardly cursed himself as he chased after her.

"Hey!" he called. She continued to walk. He finally caught up with her and was able to speak.

"Listen, miss. I am sorry but it's..." Yamcha took a deep breath before continung just as he had practiced a billion times in front of his mirror. "It's just so hard for me to control myself when I'm on the verge of exploding in my pants*"

The girl spun around and smacked Yamcha so hard, it left a red handprint on his face.

"LOW LIFE!" She yelled in annoyanc and frustration.

Ignoring his red cheek, Yamcha attempted to continue.

"You know, the world could end at any second and having just been smacked, I would die upset. But if I got to see your body, I would die happy."

"Yeah well if I saw yours, I'd die laughing!" She reponded marching off. This time, she was not followed. The scar- faced bandit sighed to himself.

_'Maybe I should try the bar...'_

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><p><em><strong>*<strong> I saw/ heard that line in a movie! Ever seen 'Anger Management'?_

_**(a/n-**__Yeah, that's all I got.… But __**'some stories are better short' ;) **Maybe I'll write a sequel...)_


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